smoke dancer

I'm pulling a mean defense against the coming winter, you may have heard shrieking at dawn. No? Well, it's kinda hard to tell since you are obviously still working on "the end of summer" and those season tickets that are ever elusive. Still, I think we can agree on the fact that neither of us are intimately ready to hibernate. I'm talking about "who" you have to hibernate with. Let's take a look at the options. 1. Are you married or legally bound to your housemate? 2. Do you have more that 3  t.v.'s in your home ?  (You can stop reading here if you've answered "yes" - we don't like you, envy you and probably have your location on foursquare anyways.)
3. Is there a mini fridge in or near the "cave"?  4. Are at least 2 of those TV's directly connected cable?

The fall television season is upon us, Olympics, Football, Casino fights, (nod to De Niro) and the Reality doldrums (slap to Snookie) ... keep rolling. O.k. , I understand the need to create a schedule. Until this past late summer (sorry but it is over) I always had a younger mini- me around during crucial scheduling times who held down the main T.V. in the house. Oh yeah, if I wanted to watch something, we could pretty much agree on one live and one recorded. She went off to College. I smell smoke.

Enter the Dragon otherwise known as the 25k square feet of space surrounding the T.V., where damage is swift, the penalties severe and there are still no known prisoners

The man who spends most of his waking moments in complete Sports Network News and the other half on Law and Order has nothing to fear from me, since he will update me on the teams and know how to dispose of me "without a trace"  - he is my equal. The one who insists on channel surfing with me in the room is taking his life into his own remote-control hands. Which brings me around to the other area  - Arsenal. There are several things that you will want to have at your disposal and they should be no more than a 1/2 arms length away. THE EXTRA REMOTE is an absolute must. Sole possession of the "unlock code" (should it come to that) and a healthy dose of  denial. I anticipate coming up against "short term memory loss",  "I never said that",  "we needs mixers - could you run out?" and my favorites: IDK< IDC<KMA<LMAO<TYAO and finally WHO? in that order.